When I get into heaven the person who invented the epidural had better be sitting on a plush golden throne with massagers and personal waiters. I will go up to them kiss their feet, offer them cake and show them my boobs. (Okay so maybe not the boobs.)

However when and if I ever come across the the MAN who came up with prenatal vitamins? I will kick him in the crotch, throw lemon juice in his eyes and run in the opposite direction. Only a man would make a woman swallow something the size of their thumb when pregnant or trying to get pregnant.

“Oh but they’re not the size of your thumb!” you say.

Whatever.
prenatals. cruel joke or not?
THUMB.
Lest you think I have teeny little thumbs lets compare the same pill to a big’ol quarter.
prenatals. cruel joke or not?

Next I had a box of samples that claimed to be small.
prenatals. cruel joke or not?
See that? SMALL FILM COATED PRENATAL VITAMINS.
My thumb says otherwise.
prenatals. cruel joke or not?
The quarter takes the pills claim of being small, gives it the bird and a big B.S. YOU STUPID PILL.
prenatals. cruel joke or not?
As if the horse pills weren’t enough there has been a new development in the prenatal vitamin front since I was pregnant.
Not one horse pill a day but TWO! BONUS!
prenatals. cruel joke or not?
prenatals. cruel joke or not?

Now back in the day I would divide my prenatal into halves, quarters, sixths, hell I’d even stick it on a toothpick and suck on it all day like lollipop. With the introduction of the horse pill’s evil gelatinous brother I’m afraid that prenatals are dead to me.

REALLY! I’m not even pregnant and the thought of swallowing these things makes me ill. 

Dear pharmaceutical companies. If the Flinstones can make a small tasty chewable vitamin when they still drive with their feet why can’t you make a tasty prenatal. SRSLY.

Comments

  1. You make an excellent point. I totally forgot how much they made me gag each time I tried to swallow. Ugh.

    They make CHEWABLE Flintstones vitamins. And gummy vitamins. Can you imagine …. sour gummy pre-natal vitamins? Yum.

    OHmommys last blog post..STOP. I just found the most comfiest pair of ballet flats. Ever. And don’t judge me!

  2. I calculated the number of gummy vitamins I had to eat to equal the power of a single prenatal: it was EIGHT. Oh woe is me having to eat eight gummy bears every day. WOE. (seriously, though, they work just as well).

    Amandas last blog post..Preschool Progress Report

  3. I SO agree with you and I’m just taking the over the counter kind. If you convince a company to make a yummy one I’ll be the guinnea pig!

    Erikas last blog post..I love getting stuff… but giving is so much better!

  4. Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this! I have been choking down these suckers through 7 pregnancies and they are gross. Your photos are great. Sorry I didn’t officially meet you at Blissdom, I did unofficially meet you as you were saying good-bye to some people on Sunday morning in your pjs.
    Toni

    The Happy Housewifes last blog post..Our Story ~ Part Three Or Why You Should Never Let Boys with Long Hair Take Your Daughters to the Airport

  5. Oh I do agree.

    Steph

  6. I eventually got over the size, but what I couldn’t stomach (sometimes, quite literally) was the nasty vanilla foretaste. Blech! Why would anyone think that vanilla flavoring would taste pleasant in a vitamin? It’s completely raunchy!

    Hillarys last blog post..Wordless Wednesday–Driven to Boredom

  7. dude, i never want to get pregnant i don’t think. i SUCK at swallowing pills.

    i’d rather get a shot than swallow a pill (thanks gag reflex).

    Maybe they could…make a prenatal vitamin PATCH. Hmm….

    mels last blog post..First day of job. . . already put in my two week notice!

  8. Let’s not even talk about the taste those nasty thumb-pills leave in your mouth. Makes me want to hurl!

    Katies last blog post..Barack O’Pocalypse?

  9. I couldn’t even take prenatal vitamins they made me so sick. So the doc recommended Flinstones. I was in heaven! But by God, those are huge!

  10. psssssssst I luff you.

    those vitamins, that’s 7 shades of crazy right there.

    rachel-asouthernfairytales last blog post..Keep Believing

  11. TWO POINTS for using the word “GELATINOUS.”

    Jenns last blog post..Too Late to Post-Date Some Entries, Huh?

  12. PrimaCare One prenatal vitamins by Ther-Rx may not be any smaller than the other kind, BUT:

    1) They are more like gelcaps, which I know you complained about because you can’t cut them in half, but the gelcaps at least go down smoothly due to their texture, rather than the dry, scratchy, square-cornered regular pills.

    2) There is just one per day. (they have regular unicare ones that are just like all the other two-a-days you photographed… ask for Unicare One)

    3) They put vanillin in the plastic outer coating, so not only do they not taste nasty, but they actually taste – AND smell – rather pleasant! Nice when you’re nauseous all day.

    It’s not as good as a gummy, I’ll grant you, but it’s definitely the best thing I’ve seen out there.

    Also, I know that at least the two-pill-a-day version includes a stoooool softener.

    Oh, and I just went back up and read what others wrote and apologies to Hillary… *I* would be that person. When it’s between that and the taste/smell of the B-vitamins and citric acid… that vitamin vibe makes me nauseous when I am NOT pregnant.

    Dellas last blog post..Response to HBM’s post about anger

  13. Oh also for some idiotic reason I started typing Unicare instead of PrimaCare, doh…. thinking about insurance, I guess.

    Dellas last blog post..Response to HBM’s post about anger

  14. There’s no doubt whatsoever that they are that size purely for psychological effect. The amount of whatever is in them could be provided in tiny wee things.

    Makes people feel like they are really doing something positive and constrictive when taking them.

    Unless you vomit them up, of course.

    Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..Clear as mucky mind mud

  15. I ended up comparing the amounts in the prenatals to the amounts in flinstones and just chewing a couple of those. I have heard from doctors (but haven’t seen any studies to this effect) that as tightly as they have to pack everything into those horsepills anyway, you can’t actually digest all of it. So you absorb more of what’s in the chewables anyway.

  16. So, it’s been over 2 years since I took prenatals (which I agree are way too big and nasty)… but why are there now 2 pills a day? What’s the 2nd one?

    punkinmamas last blog post..next

  17. Prenatal vitamins are what made me vomit. Otherwise I Had no morning sickness. My doctor said flintsone vitamins were fine! I still take those instead of women’s vitamins. :)

    Brianas last blog post..$10 off $50 Purchase Printable for Victoria’s Secret

  18. I actually took flintstones with iron when i was pregnant because i had trouble swallowing the prenatal horse pills.

  19. I don’t see why in this day and age they can’t just make them a liquid that is tasty like say cherry or grape cough syrup type liquid or even plain and make EVERYONE happy! SHEESH!

  20. Amen…hate ‘em. HUGE:P

    Nap Wardens last blog post..Sick, and Wrong

  21. what are all these fancy pills? i just buy a bottle of materna. that’s not good enough?

  22. I lvoe that you share my exact same sentiments. I asked my doc last month why I had to choke down two pills and she swears my baby will be smarter. I’m holding her to it.

    Krista Parrys last blog post..Park City Mountain Resort: A Cut of the Good Life for Families by Guest Blogger: Amber Borowski Johnson

  23. Oh so true. I used to gag on vitamins but I’ve gotten used to them by now. Still makes so sense as to why they have to be so large.

    Nell

    Nell @ Casual Friday Everydays last blog post..Stay Tuned For The Rush Hour Report

  24. I say grind that pill up and throw it in to a smoothie! Makes things much easier…

    By the way have you seen calcium supplements? I’m supposed to be taking them with my prenatal but they are just as big and you need to take 4!!! WTF?

    Talinas last blog post..20 week ultrasound appointment. We’re having a…

  25. I take Vitamin C tablets that are twice as big.
    Once you start to swallow them, tilt your head down so your chin rests on your upper chest. It works!

    kj @ Where my boys at?s last blog post..Top 10 Reasons to Oppose the Stimulus

  26. What’s extra awesome? Some of them give you fishy burps later. Not so nice for a vegetarian…

    Reeses last blog post..Spreading the Virus

  27. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. 2 Flintstones equals 1 prenatal horse pill.

    So scrap the lame-o pre-natals and go eat Fred and Dino. Same dif.

  28. Someone invented a chewable prenatal that tastes just like flintstones vitamins.
    Do you have any idea how nasty flintstones vitamins taste? After a taste of one of those I was happy to swallow the horse pills. You know, until they kicked my heartburn into overdrive.

    Jessica (from It’s my life…)s last blog post..The one about tomatoes, migraines, and birth control

  29. I find that if I coat them in chocolate syrup, my prenatal vitamins go down smoothly.

    Avitables last blog post..You. Are. Not. Safe.

  30. Hi and welcome to MBC!

    veronica lees last blog post..3D chalk sidewalk drawings by Julian Beever

  31. BLEH! Just looking at those made me queasy.

    What, pray tell, is the gelatinous brother pill for??? Are you seriously telling me they can’t fit all the vitamins we need into ONE giant pill? We need a second?? Bitches.

    Jen L.s last blog post..Nothing out of the ordinary

  32. I once returned a bottle of them to the store because they were SO FOUL (smelling and tasting). It even said on the bottle “no taste or odor.” Yeah. Right.

    Also, I like a nice BLT.

    mayberrys last blog post..How I met your father

  33. boy do i so totally agree w/ you!
    i have a hard time even swallowing a dam tylenol.

    but i discussed w/ my dr (and of course, i know everyone’s different)….
    but she said as long as i’m taking *some* vitamin, she didn’t care if it was prenatal.
    i just had to look at the iron/ folic acid.

    so i’ve taken just a plain ol’ tiny publix brand multivitamin for the better part of it. (that’s when i’d remember)

    also, i like the gummy fish of omega-3s. way better than those huge fish oil pills.

    mpotters last blog post..vividity

  34. Put them in applesauce to swallow them — it’s the only way I can take large pills!

  35. I hate them, too. I don’t take them. I take my regular and supplement what’s missing – mostly iron and folic acid. Those tablets are small puppies and don’t hurt going down.

    I’ve taken a powder – you can mix it into either water (not fantastic) or something like yogurt (not bad). It’s WAY better! And it was a super well formulated, healthy vitamin not filled with dyes and sugar and crap like that. I think it’s by Enzymatic Therapies.

    Heidis last blog post..Guess what?

  36. I tried those prenatal vitamins from the health food store. I could not get that pill down it was so freakin’ huge. I practically vomited. Ick.

    the mama bird diariess last blog post..sexiest man alive

  37. I never had a problem b/c I can pretty much swallow anything.

    That’s what she said.

  38. My last prenatal vitamin was a huge horse pill the size that you are talking about and unfortunately since it had some gel coating on it you could cut them in half or fourths or eighths. This time I just bought some generic (non-prescription) prenatal vitamins from Costco. They are still just one a day which I like but I think they are half the size of my old one. :) I too agree that you would think they could make tasty vitamin treats for pregnant ladies after all we go through to get pregnant and then the 10 months of being pregnant and then the aftermath of pregnancy. :)

  39. OH do I hear you…As if the morning sickness is not bad enough they have to throw in those horse pills. If I can’t keep my breakfast down how do they expect me to swallow those? YAK!

    Merediths last blog post..{2 More Feet}

  40. AND they make you constipated. I used to say, “no wonder I’m about about to vomit, I have poop up to my eyeballs!”

    mbs last blog post..Do I hear marbles in my head?

  41. Did i understand it right this pils are for babys?