Guess what I did.
A) I lost to a cat in heat who confused my legs with a potential mate.
B) I lost to a brand new razor.
C) I lost to a jelly jar that smashed to smithereens on my freshly washed floor.
D) I lost to a weed whacker.
E) SWINE FLU! (So it’s cool I make a swine flu joke right? I never can tell with pandemics.)
F) Blood spatter from a very serious bloody nose of a very bloody child.
G) I fell down the stairs. (AGAIN.)
Things have been a little dull and dare I say depressing around moosh in indy in the month of April so what better way to spice things up than with a very mysterious, possibly macabre photo of my most loathed body part? Hang around long enough and my blog is likely to give you whiplash no personal injury lawyer will be able to prosecute.
I dare say I’m thisclose to a bulleted list of “happenings in mooshville.”
LIKE THE FACT THAT MY HUSBAND IS DONE WITH LAW SCHOOL IN LESS THAN 24 HOURS.
And before all you naysayers get all “OH BUT WHAT ABOUT THE BAR?” up in my face, shut up and let me be happy for like 27 minutes before bar prep starts.
Then there’s that little kid that runs around here announcing what I may or may not smell like. Or what the world may or may not smell like, I swear that kids sense of smell didn’t kick in until 5 months ago. Nothing like getting a morning hug and having the love of your life announce “MOM, YOU SMELL LIKE BUTT” or “WHOA MAMA WITH THE DRAGON BREATH!” or tell you that her butt is more awesome than yours because it doesn’t bleed AND IT’S NOT HAIRY.
Which reminds me, has anyone seen my pride?
I had a wonderful birthday, thanks to everyone who gave me permission to make May my month since April is on my smells like butt poop list. So May it is. I’m even considering doing NaBlaPoMo for May.
And maybe my very first post will be to answer just what on earth happended south of the chubby kneequator.