I don’t have the energy level it requires to maintain a complaint.
I get very complacent very quickly and so when I burst into passionate annoyance or over the top dissatisfaction I rarely have the gusto to follow it up. Then I just feel like a jerk.
Getting angry about stuff takes too much energy.
Besides I usually cry about it so much in the first place (or last place or middle depending on the situation) I’m pooped before I even have a follow up argument. And then I get into that whole hurting people unintentionally with my ardent outrage.
Sorry about that.
A majority of you know I don’t like swears and that I avoid the use of them at all costs. Those of you even closer to me know that when I do swear it’s because I. MEAN. BUSINESS. Cody knows darn well that if that one word comes from my mouth in conversation it’s time to drop whatever he’s doing and save whatever or whoever is in my warpath. (Most recently it was our banker. *ahem*)
I do not abuse this power.
If you have ever or do ever hear me swear? You’d better believe it’s because something inside my mild mannered spirit has snapped.
I got into a rage tonight on twitter about the fact that after all of this health insurance LET ME HAVE MY BODY BACK so that maybe JUST MAYBE one day I can get pregnant again I find out that we are most likely not going to be able to afford maternity coverage for a few years.
*insert swear word that references the poop of a very large horned mammal here*
See. And now I feel bad.
The good news is that my husband is a lawyer (at least he had better be as of October 2, 2009 at 8:31 a.m. EST.)
The bad news is that he’s also a lawyer.
I won’t get into it. I don’t have the energy for it.
We are just at the lowest of low points as far as this whole stupid transition into adulthood will get for us (hopefully.)
I get scrappy at low points. Or when I’m pissed off, backed into a corner or worse yet emotionally drained. Cody would have you believe I get scrappy on days that end in y and during times that end with o’clock.
We have made it through the last three years together. However ironic that it is that a great majority of the last three years was spent alone and away from each other.
No more studying until 2am.
No more finals.
No more tests.
No more school.
No more bar.
I finally have him back.
And really honestly and truly that’s *** good enough for me.
(***CRAP I SO BADLY WANTED TO PUT THAT WORD UP THERE. You know, so you’d all know how serious I am. BUT I JUST CAN’T DO IT. So put it in there with your mind will you? Okay. Good. Thanks.)