Hi there. This is Casey’s right buttock.
one of these is not like the other

How are you? Me? I’m feeling a little cheeky.

It’s not everyday that I get to be the most expensive body part. I mean, under most circumstances I have to share equal glory with lefty over there. BUT NOT TODAY.

I’m going to be telling you about the money shot I got today because frankly Casey is so darn grumpy it’s actually comical and not entirely safe for her to be set loose on unassuming people at this moment in time. (Her words, not mine.)

Want to know why she’s grumpy?

this is what we call NO BUENO in the house of moosh.

Yeah. When you can actually SEE the angle of the sharpest part of the needle? Yeah.

It was really big with really thick goopy crap inside so it took awhile to unload all the goods. It has actually left the rest of Casey’s body a pretty weird kind of sore and in a general state of ticked offedness but to make matters worse bellybutton had to get in on the “annoy the everloving crap out of Casey” act too and GET INFECTED.

Drama button.

Yeah, so when bellybutton was sodomized last month they stitched her shut a layer down and glued the top layer shut.

Well the stitches aren’t dissolving but instead trying to work their way out of the incision.

Really it’s just a party in Casey’s general abdominal area which Casey never really asked for or expected.

At the doctors office Casey told the nurse she needed to get a shot of the money shot. The nurse being a sweet lady was trying really hard to keep her from seeing JUST HOW LARGE the needle was that was about to be used.

“Uh, are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure, it really is for the greater good. Besides, it’s not very often I get to have something worth more than my car shoved into my butt. I’d like to document that.”

Needless to say after Casey saw the needle she was lucky to even remain upright, let alone remember how to operate a camera.

Thankfully the literature that accompanies a Lupron Depot shot is so completely ridiculous that Casey was able to channel her anger to this image instead of all the searing pain going on in our respective pants.

people who write/design pharmaceutical literature make me want to kick puppies.
congrats i'm in medical menopause? hmm...
is the smiling woman with roots necessary?

REALLY?

WITH THE SMILING LADY ON A BIG OLD SHOT THAT GOES INTO MY BUTT?

REALLY?

Dear Maker of Lupron Depot,

Save the money on the cute picture with the model I want to punch, fancy package inserts and instead enclose a $5 gift card to Baskin Robbins.

Thank you,

Platinum Cheeked Casey

(It’s time to use your imagination again! I had a photo of me similar to the one on the Lupron Depot package with me uh, doing something unsavory with my middle finger. I felt bad about it so I didn’t post it. BUT IT WOULD HAVE BEEN FUNNY! Alas those darn morals won out yet again.)

Comments

  1. I have a weird permanent lump on my navel where they mis-stitched me. And I would absolutely feel better about it if they had given me a Baskin Robbins gift card.

    Casey Reply:

    @Veronica Mitchell, Peanut Butter and Chocolate heals all wounds. Even butt wounds.

  2. you would be so cute flipping the bird!

    Casey Reply:

    @Astacia, I really am quite adorable with my middle finger up in total ironic disgust.

  3. Lookin’ good, righty!

    Casey Reply:

    @Sarah Viola, Good thing righty hurts so bad or lefty may have gotten jealous and revolted.
    No one wants warring butt cheeks.

  4. Holy crazy big needle!!! I love the idea of the Casey version of the Lupron chick. I think she is only smiling because she knows how badly it will hurt. She’s totally mocking you, I’d flip her off too!

    Casey Reply:

    @jamie, I just make fun of her roots, makes me feel better, apparently the demographic for women needing Lupron therapy are those with bad hair.

  5. OMG, that is a crazy ginormous needle! Totally love the updated version of the Lupron chick. She’s kind’ve creepy smiling back at you as if mocking you…”this is going to hurt, A LOT!” I would give her the finger too.

    Jamie Reply:

    @Jamie, sorry about the double comment, it said error the first time! Sorry!

    Casey Reply:

    @Jamie, It’s cool. Makes me feel important that you were so stoked on commiserating with my butt cheek.

  6. OMG Casey! That is wicked HUGE! You poor thing! That is one hell of a butt cheek you got there! Go righty!

    Casey Reply:

    @Rachel, I feel bad sitting on her so much, she’s been through a lot.

  7. OH MY! Depo Lupron.. I have been on a continous nasty dose for almost the max 2 years with the required 3 month wait. No fail, back to the lupron. We just got diagnosed with ANOTHER endometrioma. Endo SUCKS

    Casey Reply:

    @nancy, I have more colorful words for Endo, as for you HUGS AND AWWW SORRY!

  8. Gah.

    But, dude, you have a cute butt. Seriously. Even though it may be sore, it’s kind of rockin’

    Casey Reply:

    @Overflowing Brain (Katie), I work best under pain. Forces me to keep my composure, not get ****y.
    And actually that photo is my but about 10 lbs. ago. It has since split those pants.
    I wish I were kidding.

  9. You need to think bigger – like home delivery of Baskin Robbins for a year, not just a $5 gift card. Glad your shot is over and there was no passing out or anything like that!

    Casey Reply:

    @Heidi, We need to hang out together more, I apparently need bigger dreams.

  10. Man, it’s your website. POST THE BIRD!!! =)

    Casey Reply:

    @Marie Green, I wanted to SO DARN BAD, but I could hear my husband rolling his eyes at me when I even considered it.

  11. I would’ve been thrilled to click over here and see you flipping the bird. I beg my mother to all of the time, because she absolutely refuses. Sometimes she’ll give in. It’s priceless. Sorry ’bout your sore booty.

    Casey Reply:

    @Amanda of Shamelessly Sassy, It’s all about saving the lewd for when it will make the most impact.

  12. did the lit booklet seriously say CONGRATS!
    you are one brave cheek-a to post a pic of your assa…i was LMAO through the whole post…of course i was NOt LMAO@you…

    Casey Reply:

    @georgie, If I could LMAO right now I’d be in a lot less pain.
    And yes, it congratulated me.

  13. I can’t believe I’m actually remember this but… it that an old photo of yo butt?!?!! LOL the photo looks familiar!

    Casey Reply:

    @Lindy, Yes. Previous bum photo. From like two years and ten pounds ago. Heh.

  14. See, now, I’m left with a conundrum: do I comment on the appearance of your butt in the first image, possibly insulting you and/or Cody and/or something else, or do I ignore it and insult you by not acknowledging it?

    There really is no winning.

    Casey Reply:

    @SciFi Dad, As long as you don’t say it’s huge and disgusting we’re good.

  15. I need to work on chipping away at your morals.

    Casey Reply:

    @Avitable, so far so fail.

  16. I had the same thing happen to my bellybutton! It was really sore, then one day a huge knot of stitches popped through the incision! It looked like my DR got bored during surgery and tried to crochet a doily. It sucked, but at the same time, when the ball o stitches came out it was kind of like popping a zit, totally gratifying!

    ps… so, no PCOS for you? Did I miss that post?

    Casey Reply:

    @Amber, I’m still waiting for it to come through. In the meantime I swear every time I forget about it and scratch it.

  17. What I really love is the first picture of the white female figure surrounded by SHARDS OF BLACK PAIN.

    Seriously, it looks like one of those old Soviet propaganda posters. Or the cover for any Ayn Rand novel, ever.

    Casey Reply:

    @Talulah, That’s exactly what I thought! ONLY BALD! RIGHT?

  18. Kristen McD says:

    Cute jeans!

    Casey Reply:

    @Kristen McD, Thanks! I have since worn them so much that I have split the crotch of them. Yes. It was a proud day.

  19. Ouch! That’s all I can say, ouch!

    Casey Reply:

    @Midwest Mommy, Thankfully pregnancy made me kind of a badass. (PUN!)

  20. I will be making your grilled peanut butter/chocolate/marshmallow sandwich tonight in honor of your booty pain.

    With pound cake b/c I’m dedicated like that.

    Casey Reply:

    @Just Shireen, Crap that sounds good.

  21. SWEARS? GESTURES? I’m shocked and awed at you woman. Shocked and Awed.

    Casey Reply:

    @Amber Mc, Yeah, I am too. Apparently I lose all demure when faced with giant needles of torture.

  22. I can’t remember if my injections hurt, but I do know that my doctor’s nurse TAKES NO CRAP and is a champion at taking blood, so perhaps she’s a champion Lupron injector also.

    Sending you a mini fan…

    Casey Reply:

    @Rhi, I told someone earlier that thankfully pregnancy made me a badass. I am quite proud of my pun.

  23. I’m with Holly – 2 large AND a needle that big?! A pharmacy rep should have been standing outside the door waiting to spoon feed you Peanut Butter and Chocolate ice cream. This is why I never look at the needle, I would have hit the floor!!

    Is Cody at least pampering you with all the butt rubs, heating pads & ice creams that you desire?

    Casey Reply:

    @Bellamomma, I didn’t even consider that. I need you guys around to help me make better demands.

  24. ***hugs***

    Casey Reply:

    @Dugi, Just not on my bum at the moment plz. thx.

  25. You had me at the big giant needle. Then I fainted onto my laptop. The end. You are my hero!

    Casey Reply:

    @Angie, I had to hold back a little bile myself.

  26. Nice butt! ;-) (And I hope I can say that without offending…)

    It’s amazing what medical ads do to make us believe there is no pain. 32 cortisone shots in my head every two weeks for 6 months? Oh, yea. You better believe I was flipping them the bird. XXOO

    Casey Reply:

    @Ree, IN YOUR HEAD? Oh someone would have ended up bloody from my absolute tirade after such an experience.

    Ree Reply:

    @Casey, they thought it would grow my hair back. It worked the first time it happened, but I guess this outbreak was immune to the efforts. ;-b

  27. Nice butt! That’s all.

    Casey Reply:

    @Angi, Thanks. Grew it myself.

  28. Ouch! That is one giant needle… Hope you and your butt feels better soon ;)

  29. lookin mighty fine there, cheeky.

  30. A lot of things would be better if they dropped the fancy inserts and just gave us ice cream. That whole manual on TSS in the tampons box? The manual that comes with anything electronic, the list goes on.

  31. i probably would have bought you an entire baskin robbins store for that picture haha

    also? total suckage with the belly button. mine under the glue haven’t dissolved yet either and it’s bugging the crap out of me (incidentally, i’m almost certin i PULLED A FEW OUT not knowing what they were)

  32. oh! one more thing: nice butt…and i’m impressed with your bend-in-half ability

  33. My husband usually rolls his eyes whenever I try and tell him stuff about “my blog people” (although he knows all your names by now) but even he was impressed by that needle and offered commiseration :)

  34. I gave blood on Wednesday. I could see the angle of that needle, too. It IS a bit scary when that happens.

    Blerg.

  35. Even if it is ten pounds more now, you still [must] have an adorable little bootay! ;p

    Sorry about the pain & expense, and I really hope the darn stuff WORKS!

  36. Oh. My. Ass. I’m sorry that big ass straw – I mean needle had to go in-country.

  37. I should have been there with you! I am a horrible friend to have taken vacation when you were faced with a needle (and an amount being passed through that needle) that should be illegal. I’ll make it up to you when I get home.

  38. heh… you mooned the blogosphere. Glad your butt is more expensive than my computer. And HDTV. Combined.

  39. My bellybutton also got infected when they were checking things out in there. Giggles was about 10 mos old and she saw my bellybutton while nursing and pinched it. I couldn’t believe she did that. But it did pop and instantly feel better!

    I think they owe you more than one GC for ice cream, I mean you just can’t say congrats to someone without a decent present. I mean look at the size of that needle. Oh wait. You did.

  40. How precious! If I never wanted a lupron shot before now…

    best of luck to you butt cheek.

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