I used to pride myself on the fact that I didn’t need my husband for anything on a day to day basis. I relied on myself and the people around me to get whatever I needed done and taken care of.
I would leave for months at a time on vacations away from home so he could study.
There was a moment when I was in Chicago in July that I realized Cody could be facedown in a ditch somewhere and I wouldn’t even know it. We never talked on the phone and the only time we would email is when one or the other of us needed something. Since I was in Chicago I couldn’t help him with anything and since I had become so self sufficient I didn’t feel the need to check in with him everyday.
I used to roll my eyes at neighbors who complained about their husbands being gone all the time (all the time being 9-5 in most cases.) Those codependent women who needed a man in their life. How pathetic right?
Some people have made comments about the way Cody treated me through law school. I say unto you we did what we had to do. He never knowingly neglected me and I never really put up much of a fight. (Okay, that’s a lie, I put up huge fights but when nothing changed? I gave up.)
We had never been through graduate school before. We both did what we had to in order to survive.
Yes, we’re paying for our mistakes now. But we’re paying. We’re not claiming emotional bankruptcy.
Instead we’re racking up cell phone bills and bathing in the glow of technology.