I had just finished singing her “Catch a Falling Star.”

She turned around and asked “Mom, can people touch stars?”

My first instinct was to say no. Burning balls of gas, millions of years away.

“Of course you can.”

“Are they like light bulbs?”

Again, burning balls of gas millions of years away ran through my head.

“They’re like shiny piles of glitter.”

She giggled, found my hand, laced her little chubby fingers in mine and snuggled close.

I buried my nose into that magical spot on her neck, surrounded by freshly washed curls.

I breathed her in.

Being a mom is hard.

At this moment the thought of her little body growing 11 hours older two rooms away from me is exquisitely painful.

In the morning she will be 11 hours closer to 6.

11 hours closer to her first day of Kindergarten.

11 hours closer to her first date.

11 hours closer to not needing me.

This is going too fast.

Comments

  1. Anne-Marie says:

    Speaking as a daughter who is now well past the kindergarten and first date stages, there will never be a time when I don’t need my mother. I’m sure the moosh will feel the same way.

    Elizabeth Kaylene Reply:

    @Anne-Marie, I second that. I’m almost twenty-two years old and I still need my mommy. To quote my favorite movie, “Mother is the name for god on the lips and hearts of all children.”

    She’ll always love you, Casey.

  2. Awww, Casey, I wish there was a way to slow it down – some secret that age would have bestowed upon me that I could pass along to you. Unfortunately, the only thing that wisdom tells me is it never, ever slows down. So memorize every little bit you can.

  3. That’s so sweet…11 hours…every minute passes so quickly, doesn’t it? SIGH

  4. Big sigh…
    My littlest is barreling towards 5 in a few months. Towards big kids school. I am not ready for all of this.

  5. Oh you are making me so sad. I have a little one that will enter kindergarten in the fall. It brings tears to my eyes at how fast it is all going. Us Moms need to lean on each other! I know I’m going to need it!

  6. You always need your mom. even if sometimes you don’t know it. she’ll never grow beyond needing you.

  7. mommabird2345 says:

    That is so sweet. *tear* Off to go find my toddler and give her lots of hugs.

  8. So beautiful and JUST how I feel tonight. My little baby 2.5yo had to start pre-school b/c of debilitating ankle surgeries. So those moments have been way far between and I hold on to them as long as I can. Sometimes I wish he would let me sleep with him.I just miss him and he is growing by leaps and bounds and I just need it to slow down. I really need it to.

  9. oh my goodness, YES.

  10. This is such a sweet story, well a little sad too, but I understand. I remember the day we brought Little G home. Hormones raging. I was so sad thinking about the day he would leave for college, or the day he would get married. Ha ha. I was getting a little ahead of my self, but someday it will happen. Thanks for sharing.

    ~Amber @ The Mom Road

  11. She will NEVER be 11 hours closer to not needing you… little girls (and big girls) always need their mommies – at least a little bit.

  12. As a Mom whose youngest just went to college last fall, I feel your pain. It all went WAY too fast, but I have found that even at 23,20,18, my kids still need me. In a different way yes, but they will never not need my love. :)

  13. I still need my mom as much as I ever did. She’s always going to be loving the moosh.

  14. I’m going to be 40 in two weeks. This morning I called my mom because I needed her to tell me a story that only she knew.

  15. Yep, I know just how you feel. I wrote about it here: http://ketner.blogspot.com/2009/09/letter-for-sara.html

    These girls… they’re heartbreakers, right? (And I wouldn’t have it any other way.)

  16. She’ll always need you, even when she doesn’t want to.

  17. Many others have said it before me, but you never stop needing – *wanting* – your mom. <3

  18. I agree that we all always need our moms. If everyone in the world had a mom as good as you, what a great place this would be.

    I have heard from someone who works in nursing that so many people have “Mom” as their last word in this world. And probably their first, too.

  19. Stop it. You’re making me cry.

  20. Sunshine says:

    Isaac starts Kindergarten this year. I am more sad about it than I thought I would be. No more growing up allowed!

  21. Even though she is older, she will always need you.

    trust me.

  22. Katie Mae says:

    Oh….you make me miss my mama! And I’m 27. Of course she’ll always need you.

  23. You are so wrong, she will ALWAYS need you!!

  24. Oh man. WAAAHHH make me cry over here. It’s so true though. I always think about how fast my girls are growing up. I can’t imagine them NOT needing me but I know someday they won’t. It’s hard.

  25. Darn you, Casey.

    ::sniff::

  26. You make me want to be a better mom. You are so awesome!

  27. Wahhhhh! My little guy starts in the fall too and I know I’m going to be just a big puddle when the day comes…

    Support group, anyone?

  28. Amy in StL says:

    She will always need you. I still find it soothing (at 40) to lie down on the couch and put my head in my mom’s lap so she can stroke my hair. Although, I did go through a few years of pre-teen/teen angsty dislike. I still needed her sometime; I just disliked needing her.

  29. She’ll ALWAYS need you.

  30. You have such a way of bringing giggle and tears. And yes, she WILL always need you.

  31. ::sniff::

    As the mom of an 18 year old I can attest to just how quickly that time flies. But just the other day he made me a birthday card thanking me for everything I’ve taught him and telling me I was his best friend, and I realized that they really do always need you. Just in different ways.

    I found you through Adam and am glad to have clicked through to this post. It took me back to the days my boy was that age.

  32. She will always need you. There is no getting closer to not needing you mommy.

  33. Knowing that little kid, if you’d told her it was burning gas, she’d have thought of farts and laughed.