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blind bokeh.
October 10, 2010

There’s a certain type of photography I envision in my head. Today I stood under a tree and made Cody stand by me as I explained my perfect picture (of course I didn’t have my camera, but trust me, epic.) I remember a post that Zack Arias wrote about seeing a picture he was about to take from five miles away, my photos don’t come to me in miles, more like inches.

Without corrective eyewear I am twice legally blind.

This also means that without my contacts in I see everything in bokeh, more specifically with an f stop of about 1.4.

For those of you who don’t speak camera…I see things like this…(literally)

Addie's first Legos

Kaleidoscope at Hallmark

sick little addie.

buds

It’s honestly not a bad way to see things, focus on what you want to (assuming it’s within six inches of your face) and enjoy the lovely blurry shapes and lights everything else makes. This time of year the sun comes right into my bedroom window in the morning filtered by the mess of trees in our backyard. To me it looks like thousands of soft orange fairly lights. It’s quite lovely.

Cody has said for years that as soon as we could afford it, I could get Lasik. This week was the first time I questioned the benefits of Lasik. Sure, I wouldn’t need contacts or glasses as much, but I wouldn’t ever be able to enjoy the bokeh coming in my bedroom window ever again, well, unless it was through my camera.

My camera would have to speak bokeh to me, because my eyes wouldn’t be able to do it for me anymore by default.

Yet another reason my camera is as important to me as breathing.

through my lens, lisa leonard necklace.

Related posts:

  1. blame the dog? nah, it was totally the window.

Comments off.

By Sherry Lane on 10.10.10 11:42 pm | Permalink

ME TOO!! I always bet people that my eyes are worse than theirs, lol. My contact prescription is -7.50, how about yours? When I am walking around practically blind, I say ohh, that would be a good picture!! Never thought about not seeing that again(beside through my camera) if I also decide to get LASIK….

By Suebob on 10.10.10 11:49 pm | Permalink

I can’t even see that I have toes with my glasses off. Like Sherry Lane, I am -7.50 in one eye, 7.25 in the other.

I love bokeh. These are great shots.

By Melissa on 10.10.10 11:50 pm | Permalink

Brilliant.

My vision without correction is 20/400, so I know exactly what you mean about seeing those fairy lights of colored leaves outside your window. I work for an eye doctor and yet I have always refused Lasik–maybe, subconsciously, for the same kind of reason.

By Jenn on 10.10.10 11:53 pm | Permalink

Sherry – I got you beat at -8.00! :)

I often hold things close up, become obsessed with the shallow depth of field and think, oh, if only I had a lens that would do this.

I’ll invest in Lasik someday, but until then, I’ll enjoy my homemade bokeh.

Sherry Lane Reply:
October 10th, 2010 at 11:57 pm

@Jenn, Lol, yes, you do! You are the first!! But I am sure there are more out there. Hopefully mine don’t get any worse, but I’m only 27!! So we’ll see. :)

By Danielle ExtraordinaryMommy on 10.11.10 12:08 am | Permalink

This is so beautiful. Just like you. I’ll confess, the terminology is over my head…but you? I love.

By Emily on 10.11.10 12:13 am | Permalink

I think I’d like to see things the way you see them, at least for a little while. A new perspective is always refreshing!

By Mon on 10.11.10 1:58 am | Permalink

Sherry, I think I have you beat. My contact prescription is -11.0 in one eye and -11.25 in the other. Being able to see something clearly that is 6 inches away would be great. My focal point is about 2 inches away. I just have fuzz without my contacts.

Great photos! I think it is hard for people to understand what having poor vision “looks” like.

Engineer Bob Reply:
October 11th, 2010 at 9:54 am

@Mon, You have me beat. I am -8.5 in my left and -9.5 in my right. I don’t run into many people that can match my bad eyesight. My big problem is the nystagmus I was born with that only allows me to see 20/30 to 20/40 with contacts.

Nicole Reply:
October 11th, 2010 at 11:30 am

@Mon,
Well i thought i had this one in the bag, but you beat me, not by much though. My contacts are -10.5 in both eyes!!

Love the bokeah, the lego phot is my favorite!

Sherry Lane Reply:
October 11th, 2010 at 12:14 pm

@Nicole, Wow, I’m not as bad as I was thinking! We are not alone out there ladies! Lol… I sleep with my glasses on and my husband makes fun of me. But I would like to know if that is my kid or a stranger standing over my bed at 3 am!! :)

By Krista on 10.11.10 2:47 am | Permalink

Wow, thanks for the great illustration of what it would look like to you… I wear glasses, but I can survive without them (and did for 5 years until I figured out how to make my glasses work/had too many headaches).

Last summer I was all signed up for Lasik – even had the horrid eye exam where they dilate your eyes (and it lasts allllll day) and then whoops, I’m pregnant. I really wasn’t planning on being pregnant as obviously then Lasik is out. Then I had to tell everyone why my surgery was canceled and just a few weeks later I had a miscarriage. That sucked, royal. I kind of figured it was God’s way of telling me not to do it because I was on the fence about it. But it was a really crappy way to do it.

All that to say, I probably will never do it now because an optometrist later told me that even if you have it you will probably need reading glasses by 40 and my entire goal was to lose the glasses that give me so many problems (and yes, I have tried many brands/types of contacts and never found any that didn’t make my eyes red and itchy after just a few hours).

May you make an informed decision in another couple of years! (post baby and nursing! :)

By Katie on 10.11.10 7:52 am | Permalink

I love the way you see.

By lceel on 10.11.10 8:36 am | Permalink

Yeah. What Katie said. You ‘see’ just fine.

By Lauraszoo on 10.11.10 8:41 am | Permalink

I “get” the seeing through the camera thing. I have NO depth perception at all, so everything I see is kinda like a 2D photograph. It’s neat how everyone is so unique, with all of our little quirks n stuff.

By Krystina on 10.11.10 9:12 am | Permalink

oh, so that’s the name for that weird way my eyes work. I hate leaving my contacts in the bathroom, because I feel like my glasses throw me off balance and without them . . . I can’t anything but a book 4-6 inches in front of my face. and I would love to capture my sight on camera, but I just have a dingy point and shoot, so I’ll let you do it for me!
I still think happy baby thoughts for you :)

By Angi on 10.11.10 9:47 am | Permalink

I love your pictures. I so wish I was getting married in Indy so you could capture the beauty of my day.

By Carmen on 10.11.10 10:34 am | Permalink

I see just like you. I’ll bet that’s why I love you – and your photos – so, so much.

By Carissa on 10.11.10 10:41 am | Permalink

So here’s my question.. is bokeh just that the background is out of focus, or is bokeh the actual bubbly light effect out of focus.. like the magic wand.. (magic photo btw!) ??

By Mrs. Wilson on 10.11.10 10:43 am | Permalink

I also see in bokeh with an f stop of 1.4. I always hated it until I thought of it in relation to my camera.

I can’t say that I wouldn’t give it up for Lasik and never having to wear glasses or contacts again (or feeling around to find either of those things)though.

:)

By Malia on 10.11.10 10:44 am | Permalink

My eyesight’s not so bad but this post has me thinking that I don’t spend enough time sans corrective eyewear. I’m probably missing some really neat stuff!

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By Sarah on 10.11.10 12:21 pm | Permalink

No joke, I seriously had this same thought yesterday. I was just sitting there and looking around, and it occurred to me that my eyes actually have better bokeh than my own lenses (I have yet to own one of the super wonderful f1.4 lenses yet…) – it got me looking around at different things and wondering what camera settings would produce the same visual. Haha now if I can just get my camera to spit out what my eyes can see!

By Issa on 10.11.10 1:21 pm | Permalink

I actually love those photos, because I see like that as well. Probably worse. ha.

Lasik won’t even work on me. In fact, mine are so bad I can’t wear contacts. I used to care, but now? It’s just part of me. I see differently. What’s so wrong with that?

By Aubrey on 10.11.10 1:52 pm | Permalink

I’m on the other side of the fence – I used to have bad eyes until I got Lasik. I have to say, if you’re able to get it, you won’t regret it. But it is good to look on the bright side – your vision has taught you how to look for things that would look excellent in bokeh! Loved this perspective.

By Redneck Mommy on 10.11.10 1:54 pm | Permalink

Just stopping by to tell you thoughts of you were filling my heart today. Thinking of you my blind, bokeh friend.

xo

By tara on 10.11.10 5:01 pm | Permalink

I love this! I see bokeh too, without my contacts (though lots of y’all have me beat on the numbers). I’ve never wanted Lasik, mostly because all the people I know who have had it done now wear glasses (which I try to avoid whenever possible).

By Kim on 10.11.10 5:17 pm | Permalink

Don’t want to bust your bubble but you have to wait a year after pregnancy/breast feeding to have surgery and you can’t get pregnant for a year after surgery. My surgeon said the hormones change your vision. I had PRK (similar to Lasik) and I didn’t get pregnant for over a year after surgery and still my one eye changed drastically. Again, that’s what happened to me; it might be different for others. When I had perfect vision in both eyes, it was pretty awesome!

By Adventures In Babywearing on 10.11.10 6:27 pm | Permalink

I’m blind, too. Did we know that about each other? I can barely see a hand in front of my face without it being blurry, though. It scares me sometimes, but I’m still so afraid of surgery. I love your bokeh photos.

Steph

By Ashlee on 10.15.10 4:32 pm | Permalink

Got Lasik in August and it is HEAVEN!!!

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