“Your belly is still squashy.” *poke poke poke*

“That’s because it carried two babies. The more babies it carries the more babies I have to snuggle, the softer my belly needs to be. Would you want to snuggle with a hard mom?”

“Nope. So that’s why your chest is squashy and your bum is squashy and your legs are squashy?”

“Yep. All the better to snuggle you with.”

“So you’ll never get unsquashy?”

“Not until I’m out of babies to snuggle.”

“Vivi’s squashy because she’s a baby and we have to snuggle her right?”

“Right.”

“Someday will I be super comfy like you?”

“Yep. It’s one of the best parts of having babies. Becoming their favorite comfy place.”

I read a biography a long time ago about a mother and her daughter said something like “I’m so glad my mom was always comfortable. She always felt like a mom. She never tried to fit into worldly stereotypes. She was just happy being our mom.”

As Addie was poking my soft parts it would have been so easy to use negative self talk, the word fat or begin talking about how I needed to work out. Addie may have ignored me completely or she may have listened to every word I said and I would have planted a seed about what she is supposed to look like as a girl or woman.

I am happy and I am healthy.

On my squashy parts is where both of my girls like to lay their heads the most.

snuggle vivi.

Why would I want to say something negative about them?

Comments

  1. This is truly lovely. Thank you for this. :)

  2. She does look very happy right where she is. Beautiful.

  3. Wonderful!

  4. awesome

  5. This makes me feel better about my squishy parts!! <3

  6. I love this. My mom never talked about diets or exercising or being fat, although she was significantly overweight. As an adult woman with my own squooshy bits, I am lucky enough to not inherit any body image issues from my mom. Sure, I have my own insecurities, but they are mine, not hers.

    Gah, I just love this post. Love, love and more love.

    xox

  7. I adore you and your squishy parts. ;)

  8. I love this so very much. It’s truth, every word.

  9. RsqAnimals says:

    Perfect!

  10. Mamas make nice pillows.

  11. Me either. :)

  12. I try to remind myself of exactly this when I am feeling bad about those extra pounds I never can get rid of. My son loves to snuggle with me in a way he doesn’t with his dad and I know part of that is because I am “squashy”. Thansk for saying it so well.

  13. Oh, man. I love this so much.

  14. Love this! Trying to learn to love my squishy parts!

    Suzie

  15. I’ve got plenty of squishy parts. That said, I’d like to make them less squishy but for me and my health not to fit some mold of what a woman is supposed to look like.

    Thus, I love the message here: Squishy is ok! Our young girls need more of that and less of certain images in their faces.

    Stacey Reply:

    @Stacey,

    Ooops “squashy” not squishy ;)

  16. Beautiful, exactly how I feel and what a great example you are setting for your daughters.

  17. This is such a great post that I’m sharing it on my FB page. I love that you didn’t cave in to negative self-talk and enjoy those squishy parts. I’m going to adopt that perspective too! Thank you!

  18. “Yep. It’s one of the best parts of having babies. Becoming their favorite comfy place.”

    This brought tears to my eyes today. Thanks.

    I leave work each day at 1:15 to go pick up my daughter Lila from preschool. Then I wash her up and change her clothes and tuck her into bed with a book for a nap. I sing. She’ll rub my hand…

    Then after that, I grab my Vivienne and I rock her and she smooshes into me and I hold her for 15 minutes before I have to go back to work. She just melts into me before I put her in her crib for her nap. And today? She was rubbing my arm while I rubbed her back.

    Oh, I love these girls. I love this Mommy role. I’m happy being a softy.

    Thanks for this post.

  19. We poke a lot of cushy bellies in our house. All look good to me. Even my stretched out butterfly tattoo on my tummy.

  20. kristen self says:

    absolutely love this post!!!!!! i have lots of squashy parts from infertility issues and then my pregnancy… but i think amelia likes me squashy parts so they are fine by me too!

  21. Amen, sister!

  22. I’d probably place this in my top five favorite blog posts I’ve ever read. You are so right, and I needed to be reminded of this.

  23. I heart this. Heart your outlook. What a blessing for your little ones to see your example :)

  24. Bookmarked this for the days I need reminded… which is often. My 5 year old insists I’m having another baby because my belly looks like. Sigh.

  25. Ditto… I was once told by my nephew that I was built for comfort and not speed!!!

  26. Thank you for this. You brought tears to my eyes and sunshine to what was looking to be a bad day. :)

  27. Good stuff.

  28. So love this.

  29. My 4 year old calls my stomach and breasts my “pillow parts”.

    And we have a Vivi too! Violet is 12 months old, and before she was born I didn’t know any other Violets, now they are everywhere!

  30. My niece tells me quite often that she likes my belly. It’s squishy and a=soft and a good place to lay her head.

    My almost 9 year old daughter told me she was happy I was squishy, because I was comfortable to her. About two months ago she was embarrassed that I was taking her to the park. It goes back and forth with her.

    Either way I give her a hug and a kiss and tell her I love her just the way she is.

  31. What a beautiful post. I love that your conversation with your daughter went like that. It’s a beautiful concept and so true.

  32. Thank you for making me re-think the way I view myself since becoming a mum xxx

  33. I love it!! :) I constantly criticize myself and it’s hard to see it positively. But it’s oh so true. I don’t want my bf to be only muscle, so why would others want me to be that way? It’s only me putting this pressure on me!

  34. Jessica V. says:

    Thank you for giving me a new appreciation for my squishy parts. Of course I never thought of it like this. SO the next time my son tells me that it looks like my back has gills I can explain this to him. “it’s all for you, baby!”

  35. I love this. I think I may need to save it for when I feel down about my squashy parts =)

  36. So well said Casey!!! What a wonderful positive message to offset all the negative body images for munchkins growing up today!!!

  37. This is exactly what I needed to hear (read) today. Thank you.

  38. not gonna lie – I’m smiling and tearing up. Sometimes I look at my size 14 self in disgust, but sometimes I remember that my kids love hugging me, all of me, and they think I’m beautiful. thanks for posting.

  39. oh casey. Every time I think you can’t get any awesomer, you do.

  40. I love this! I’m going to use it the next time my 8 year old son says I need to work out.

  41. I love this. You have like 50-60+ years to worry about thinness and hard bodies and that stuff when this season is over. Now is not the time to be giving that stuff any mental space.

    Hugs!
    SK

  42. sweet way of thinking about it. I think I’ll be squishy even when I’m done having babies (thanks to having babies!)

  43. What a beautiful picture and way to look at my body. Guess those two big squashy parts are useful for something else besides endlessly nursing the baby!

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  2. [...] And now I have a new love for my squashy parts.  [...]

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