It’s no secret that I’ve been feeling tops lately.
When I try to narrow it down to just one or two things that are really doing it for me…I can’t. I think I’m just at a point where everything seems to be humming along at a manageable pace. Yet at the same time I am actively trying to keep *this* up more than I ever have. I have a reason to fight and I am fighting.
Could it be just one thing? Sure. Could it be the perfect harmony of all the things I am doing? I guess so.
But I also feel as though I should add a disclaimer here.
I still have moments of struggle. Hard ones where I feel overwhelmed and beat. At one point I had to ask Cody to come home so I could dig out, I knew if I tried to do it all on my own I would have crashed and everything I have so well balanced right now would have shattered into unrecognizable pieces that couldn’t have been recovered easily.
I guess you could say that it’s not so much about being happy as it is about having a really strong rebound.
I use my SAD lamp every morning as soon as I wake up. Vivi lies next to me in bed for a half an hour as we soak up our daily artificial sunlight. I don’t think it really matters what kind you have, what matters is that you use it and use it everyday.
One of the things I do each day when I sit in front of my SAD lamp is read scriptures. Out loud. Not only does it give Vivi something to listen, it makes me really focus on them. I am capable of making a grocery list, a laundry list and tactical war plans in my head all while attempting to read something. I have really tried to pay attention to what the scriptures say…especially now that I’m hot and heavy into Isaiah. Dude is heavy. God is important to me and I have felt that by starting my day out with Him I’m better prepared for what may come. I would think reading anything uplifting would have the same effect for those who do not actively practice any particular religion.
I pray at least twice a day. Sometimes out loud, sometimes in my head, sometimes on my knees and sometimes curled up in the fetal position, what matters is that I do it.
I take an iron pill, vitamin C and fish pills every morning with my breakfast. A really good Omega 3-6-9 combo will supposedly have every good effect under the sun on you, including mental well being. Hooey or not, I take them and always have. Also? Eat breakfast. And lunch. And dinner. Being hungry doesn’t do anyone any good.
I keep busy. Obviously. This one is pretty self explanatory. But I have also learned how to say no.
I keep the bad stuff out. No bad TV shows, no bad books, no bad movies, no bad influences. It’s really hard to hate anything when you don’t let hate into your life.
I take my medication every night. I finally feel as though I am on the right one for me. I am capable of highs and lows, ups and downs but without any dramatic side effects or mood changes (well, every 28 days there’s some *minor* mood fluctuations.) I feel…dare I say it…normal.
Then of course there is the big kid, the baby, the cats and my husband. I love my home. I love everyone who lives here. I love hanging out with them. My home is a safe refuge for me where I can keep the bad out and for the most part only let good in. I think everyone needs a place where they feel safe.
Home is my safe place.
Hopefully this continues for a very long time.
While I am here…I’ll just be around, you know…smiling and stuff.
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