I kind of wondered when and if this day would come, the day when Vivi showed a obvious preference between parents. I thought that maybe it was a one time thing since I was all busy being postpartumally depressed with Addie that she took to liking her dad a lot more, but today proved otherwise.

When Vivi saw me for the first time yesterday morning after I had been gone all weekend she said squeaked at me,  pulled my hair, then demanded I feed her breakfast, and give her all of my stuff to play with. She sobbed when I didn’t follow through on her final request (PHONES ARE NOT BABY TOYS VIVI.)

When she saw Cody come through the door at lunch she screamed an enthusiastic “HI DAD!” and ran to meet him at the door just as fast as those little chunky legs could carry her. At one point he dared to go to the bathroom and Vivi followed him to the door and sobbed giant crocodile tears until he was done and she was back in his arms.

Thirteen Months

Y’all, I may have baked her, but her daddy has her heart.

I can remember with Addie being so offended that she liked Cody so much more than me. SHE WOULDN’T BE ALIVE IF IT WEREN’T FOR ME AND MY UTERUS. I was convinced that from year one she was going to hate me, love her dad and end up in therapy because I never loved her enough as a baby.

The second time around? Yeah, it kind of sucks, but to be fair I kind of want to scream “HI CODY!” run to the door and hang on him all day too. In the end I know we’ll have a completely separate and unique relationship compared to the one she has with Cody and if it’s anything near as wonderful as the one I have with Addie today? I can manage a few more years of being the second string parent.

Sometimes it seems like even the cats like Cody better.

I’m with her all day, I’m old news. But Cody’s the one that leaves in the morning and plays the world’s longest game of peek a boo with her Monday through Friday under the guise of  “having a job.”

To any first time parents out there who may be sad that you’re not your baby’s favorite? Your day is coming, they just have to realize how boring your spouse is before they move on to how awesome and amazing you are. (Or at least that’s what I tell myself.)

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I look forward to sharing these kinds of stories and experiences with you here once more before becoming a regular over at Disney Baby later this week. Thanks to Disney Baby for sponsoring this post.

Comments

  1. Not that I’m judging Cody based on the picture, but if I were to extrapolate based on my own experience, our daughter seems to love the person who’s willing to do the hard work of letting her sit on their lap while we watch a movie. That person is me. Nothing like being a warm place to sit while watching moving pictures to win my daughter’s heart.

    Casey Reply:

    @neal, Yeah, I can’t really blame her, I like sitting by him too.

    llcall Reply:

    @Casey, Don’t let Neal fool you…he is undoubtedly our daughter’s favorite at all times and in all settings. Despite also being all “postpartumally depressed,” she actually preferred me for the first year because I had milk coming out of me at all hours of the day and night. But now she more often yells, “Get out!” when I come in the room. In my wildest dreams, I never pictured my TWO-year-old yelling that at me. But it helps to know I’m not the only one who is passed over.

  2. Most of the time my kids like the hubby better…that goes for the youngest MOST of the time. Unless they need permission to do something…then they head straight to me..because they know I’ll say yes! I’m a sucker for saying yes. Meh, they can play favorites..I enjoy watching..just like I can tell you do.

    Casey Reply:

    @Shannon, I’m always the one that says no because Cody always undercuts me with yes. Oy.

  3. My oldest went through phases where she wanted me more than her dad, and vice versa. Her allegiance seemed to shift every couple of months.

    With Lucy, though, her dad is out of the picture & lives 3,000 miles away, she doesn’t even know who he is. So you’d think that she doesn’t have any choice except to love me, right? Oh, but you’d be wrong. Instead she’s decided that my dad hung the moon. When we go to their house, she launches herself out of my arms to get to him, and she cries and reaches for him when I put her in the car to go home.

    I think some little girls just naturally gravitate toward the dad/grandpa/male figure is in their lives.

    Casey Reply:

    @cindy w, My girls do love their grandpas as well. (Perhaps they also have a thing for GOOD men as well?)

  4. Oh boy! I feel this is right around the corner for me too!

    He’s already getting the big smiles!

    Casey Reply:

    @Kristen @ The Chronicles of Dutch, Yeah, prepare yourself. It hurts the first time around.

  5. I so remember this! I quit nursing her at 15 mo. to go to my mom’s funeral. It was first time I left my daughter to go out of town and when I came back and she had already moved on. All she wanted was daddy.
    I knew I should be grateful she took to dad but I was a little jealous!

    Casey Reply:

    @April, Ack! I think that may have been what happened this past weekend, I left and Vivi’s alliances shifted.

  6. My sons loved, LOVED my husband. But my 2 yo daughter loves me. And it drives me crazy. I have to be the one to put her in bed at night (which really, if you heard both me and my husband sing, it is not me you would choose to have sing ever again … EVER), she insists on going everywhere with me and if I have the nerve to shower without her, she lays on the floor outside the bathroom and does the saddest little knocks on the door until I come out. I feel like I’m never alone. I would be perfectly fine if she decided dad was the best for a while, just so I could go to the bathroom in peace!

    Casey Reply:

    @Jenn T., Um, Addie is 7 and I am RARELY ever alone, sorry about that.

  7. Being in general a very jealous person (it comes from my need to always win except I never put myself ahead of anyone so I never win so I’m usually jealous. Its a terrible catch 22) I hate it when I feel like the kids prefer dad over me, especially bc we are equally together and apart. But you’re right we have very different personalities, parenting philosophies and relationships with the kids. And I kind of like that I have this unique relationship with each of them. and it’s okay that they have a different with their dad and not just bc I’m the fun one. =)

    Casey Reply:

    @Marta, Ooh, see I’m okay with it because Cody can’t get away from them, he loves them too much to say “Go bug mom.” Perhaps he loves ME too much to tell them to “Go bug mom.” Heh.

  8. Mine are all hooked on me (literally) while I”m breastfeeding. But, after that, they are all about their daddy. :(

    Casey Reply:

    @Jennifer Dickison, Well, you’ve got to love the boob that feeds you!

  9. Vivi’s talking?! I need video!