I don’t rant very often.

But I spent the afternoon with my family at the mall.

Shoe shopping.

We were woefully unsuccessful.

And I left grumpy. But not because of the shoes.

Because of the teenagers.

Let me say this, neither Addie or Vivi will ever be allowed to leave the house in shorts or skirts that end above their fingertips.

There wasn’t a single girl wearing these…things, who wasn’t constantly pulling them out of her crotch.

I saw more butt cheek fold today than I’ve ever seen on MTV, VH1 and E! combined. ON TEENAGERS.

I had to physically restrain myself after seeing a MUCH OLDER MAN ogle a girl in a short skirt.

I wanted to take her to the side, grab her by the shoulders and say “HONEY. YOUR BUTT. IS HANGING OUT. WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE (11 years ago?) THAT WAS ILLEGAL. A MAN OLDER THAN YOUR DAD JUST ENJOYED LOOKING AT IT. COVER THAT UP. HAVE SOME RESPECT FOR YOURSELF.”

Then there were the bare midriffs.

YES.

Never have bare midriffs been acceptable unless you are on the beach/pool, near a beach/pool or walking to the beach/pool. Even then? Bare midriffs are debatable. With this being the case about bare midriffs, they are certainly not okay on TEENAGERS at the MALL in INDIANA in SEPTEMBER.

Google “cute teen clothing?”

YOU GET THIS.

WHEN DID THIS BECOME OKAY?

Google “modest teen clothing?”

You get…well. Let’s just say some people have some ideas about over the top modesty.

Shouldn’t there be some middle ground?

That being said, there were some girls who did cover themselves. Who dressed to flatter their body instead of flaunt it. I wanted to congratulate them. Thank them. THANK THEIR MOMS. The best part? They were the ones that stood out in a sea of non existent denim and tiny tank tops with multi colored bras hanging out from underneath them.

So.

That’s my rant.

(See also, ice cream is more delicious this week than other weeks. Make of that what you will. *ehem*)

Comments

  1. @Jen M, I fully understand and respect you picking your battles and have no doubt you’re raising your children well. But I have to say that for me, it isn’t about being ashamed of their bodies – it’s about teaching them to respect their bodies and wear what is appropriate (or at least more appropriate), and about the truth of the world – how people will treat them because of their dress and the impression it gives to others (whether friends, strangers, or future bosses and coworkers). I have no doubt it isn’t easy, it never is for parents and never will be. It’s a battle I would choose to fight – to an extent. And that extent is not allowing my niece’s ass to be literally SEEN because her shorts are that short.

  2. I have a Facebook friend (who I used to go to church with, btw) who constantly posts highly sexualized pictures of her teen and tween daughters THAT SHE TAKES HERSELF! It bothers me so much, but she’s not a good enough friend that I feel I could say something to her about it. Some of the pictures from her recent family trip show the girls rolling up their shirts to get fake belly/practically pubic bone tattoos from a street vendor and posing in skimpy bikinis in the water with arched backs. The younger girl is maybe 11 years old? It’s SOOO creepy!

  3. Casey,

    Seriously I have a 12 year old daughter who is 5’6″ tall and only weighs a mere 90 some pounds. She is tall and most shorts look very short on her. She is a really sweet girl who has a heart for God and others but it is a serious struggle to help her navigate this journey. The sexualization of tweens is profoundly prevalent and honestly, my girls are some of the only ones left in the neighborhood pool not wearing bikinis let alone what I call “shanties”…denim panties. I’m disgusted most of all that God entrusts these girls to us, their very lives to us and most of their friends moms aren’t even thinking along the lines of just plain protecting their kids/girls. That not only is dressing this way immodest, it can and is dangerous. Sexually these girls are not emotionally developed enough to know what kind of sexual messages this is sending. I’m tired. So tired of this fight. I’ve eased up on some things (letting her wear makeup in 7th grade) to counter all of the other fads/trends that I’m forbidding she participate in. It is a balance that requires total dependence on a higher power, and a tough stance on protection more than modesty. Sigh…you’ve hit a hot button subject for me. Thanks for sharing. I shared with my other 987 facebook friends. I only wish I wasn’t so alone in this fight. Most moms of my girls friends just don’t give a crap or they’re too concerned with their girls’ popularity to care.

    The End.

  4. @Jen M, Wearing clothing in 1960 and 1970 that was short and revealing was different than clothing right now that is short and sexually suggestive. Our culture is sexually driven in every way and 100 times worse than in the 60’s and 70’s. It is overt sexuality and an overt sexualizing of girls/tweens. I AM a Mother of a teenager. I do know and I am sick of other mothers using the excuses of “well we dressed like this in the 70’s”. Pornography was not available in people, let alone teenagers pockets on a phone in 1970. The incidents of sexual abuse in the 1970’s were lower and let us not even get into the massive 4.8 BILLION girls that are being circulated in the sex trafficking industry around the world 14% of which are OUR AMERICAN KIDS (see http://www.ijm.com for statistics) I’ve had it with mothers of my friends kids making excuses and then crying when their girls are engaging in sexual activity before they are adults and wondering why. We are not closed or repressed in our home. Our 10 and 12 year old girls know words I didn’t know til I was 19 or 20 and just last week we discussed sexting and oral sex at the dinner table. We are under attack, and I for one am going to fight.

  5. I totally agree. I live in Florida, near the beach, and it is embarrassing to see what some people consider appropriate. It makes me sad to see booty shorts in the toddler section when I shop for my grand-daughter… Really??? You should see some of the baby bikinis… Sad.

  6. @Erica, Whew, thank you. I thought I’d be the only one with a similar comment. I wear stuff like that all the time — except the shorts-so-short-you-can-see-the-inside-of-the-pockets, mini skirts, and belly shirts, but only because I like my ass covered, and I have a cheeseburger baby belly that no one needs to see — and like you said, the key is moderation. If I wear short shorts, I’m wearing either a full tank top or tee shirt with it. More revealing clothing can be fun and flirty, if done right, and if you have the confidence for it.

    BUT, do I think teens should be wearing stuff like that? No, no, and no — especially not the shorts-so-short-you-can-see-the-inside-of-the-pockets. JUST no.

  7. I’m kind of saddened by the comments here; I don’t think teenage girls are “hoochie mamas” or “smutty” or “hookers.” They’re just teenage girls. Yes, some of the clothes are much too revealing for someone under eighteen, but they’re still kids. I’m not too comfortable with talking about kids that way.

    Personally, I wouldn’t wear some of that stuff, but I do wear some of it depending on my comfort level, and like it when combined with something less revealing. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with a tank top. Basically, my rule of thumb is if my ass is going to flash everyone in the world, or if my cheeseburger baby belly is going to say hello to everyone, I’m not wearing it. But I’d so rock a pair of stiletto heels — if they didn’t hurt my feet — with a pair of shorts (not shorts-so-short-you-can-see-the-inside-of-the-pockets but still short) and a tee shirt. I think the key is moderation, and it’s sad that these girls don’t yet understand moderation… but someday they might. What’s really sad is that they don’t have some kind of parental figure saying, “Miniskirt?! HELL no, you are NOT going out in that!” That’s bad parenting, not teenage sluttiness.

  8. This summer I went and stayed with my little sister for two weeks while my stepmom was out of town. She was 12 at the time, just turned 13 last week. She is a fashionable kid, and very pretty, and saves her money to buy her own clothes, mostly at Abercrombie and Hollister. And she had the short shorts. Oh my lord. First off, the schools have a dress code, but they don’t enforce it. So all of her friends are walking around in them. Secondly, even the shorts from Abercrombie kids/juniors were that short. It’s awful! No one should be seeing 12 year olds butt cheeks! These kids are so young they may not even GET how older guys could be looking at them – they’re just wearing what is popular. But in reality, it is something people will look at, and it’s pretty inappropriate. Uck.

  9. we call them denim diapers and we look forward to cold weather when the diapers are (mostly) at home!